Saturday, September 10, 2011
Love Them. =)
Today was game day here in Nebraska. In case you didn't know. Which you should, because Nebraska is the most incredible place to be on game day. Anyway, Seth's dad called me this morning and told me that they, (he and Stephanie) were coming to Lincoln for the game! Was I excited? Why yes. Yes I was. So when they got here we went out to eat and afterward made our way to the stadium and went our separate ways, they went to the sky box and I headed for the student section. During the 4the quarter they got me up into the sky box and Oh.My.Goodness. It was so cool! I was so excited my heart was pounding as we opened the door to get into our box! (Warren Buffet watches the games from sky boxes. That's how cool it is.) As soon as we walked in there was a server who offered to get me ice cream. And there was tons of other food just sitting out for us. Not to mention the view! And the V.P. of the college was in there with us. It was just amazing. I will probably never be in one of those again, but that quarter was good enough for me. So cool! And I was so glad I was able to see Seth's parents again! They are such awesome people and I'd missed them. A lot. I love that family. Hopefully one day it will be mine. =)
Sunday, September 4, 2011
6 MONTHS!!!
Friday was Seth's six months mark. (As well as my little sister's 10th birthday.) Six whole months have already passed since he reported to the MTC! Can you believe it!? I can't! Each day seems to take forever, but the weeks have just flown by. I need to add another picture to my photo count-up on the side...I just haven't gotten that far yet. Anyway, in honor of this wonderful 1/4 mark I will share one of my favorite pictures of him on his mission and pieces of the latest letters I've received.
"I miss you. Thank you so much for the letters that you send me. I love hearing about your life and knowing that you are happy. Oh, you make me smile. =)" (Smile by Uncle Kracker was our first "song," by the time he left we had quite a few added to that list. Is it weird that I haven't been able to listen to any of them yet?)
"Just so you know, whatever happens after the mission even if you are married to someone else remember that I will always be your friend, your best friend. And Elder Haslam, Elder Plank, Elder Tagge, and I all say Hi. I love you, Sierra!"
"You are amazing! Don't forget to study the scriptures cada dia." I love how he still looks after me. lol I also love how our letters are 100% Spanglish.
Also, I wrote a letter to his companion a while ago and I got his response.
I asked what kind of missionary Seth was and he answered, "He is one of the best. He is progressing very fast and he really knows how to teach the people. I am learning a lot from him and I've got more than 4 times as much time as he does on the mission. He is going to be a great missionary."
Then asked what stands out about Seth to him and he said, "I'd have to say the spirit he has with him. He always brings the spirit when he teaches and he always is following the promptings."
I told him that Seth always used to love pulling pranks on me and teasing me and asked if he did any of that to his companion. His response? "Thankfully he hasn't yet but I think he might be planning one out as I write so thanks for the heads up. I'll be watching my back and sleeping with one eye open now." Haha...Oh, Seth...
And last but not least I asked if I was being a distraction. I really don't know what I would have done if he would have said yes, but I needed to be sure because I don't want to hinder the work and keep him from progressing. I also told him to watch out for Seth because sometimes he does some stupid things. lol He's a smart boy, but he's a boy nonetheless and we all know their brilliant ideas aren't always super safe. His companion told me, "No, you are not a distraction. We missionaries need a lot of support and love because it keeps us going when times get tough. He is focused so don't worry. I'm making him work so hard he doesn't have time to get distracted. Don't worry I'm watching out for your Elder Ramsay and I'll make sure he comes back with honor."
Oh gosh. I miss that boy. Lately I've been slacking a little bit and it's hard for me to remember what it was like when he was here. I know I was happy and content when I was with him and I know I haven't had that exact feeling since he left, but I've forced myself not to think about it for so long it's almost difficult to bring it back to the front of my mind. Sometimes it feels as if this missionary girlfriend thing is just a dream. It truly feels like I have an imaginary boyfriend. When I look at pictures of him, though, I remember. When I read his letters, it comes back. And when I truly think about my life without him, I can't. I know this will all be worth it, I just have to do this six month thing three more times and I have a feeling these next three times are going to be much easier than the first. Halfway mark, here I come.
"I miss you. Thank you so much for the letters that you send me. I love hearing about your life and knowing that you are happy. Oh, you make me smile. =)" (Smile by Uncle Kracker was our first "song," by the time he left we had quite a few added to that list. Is it weird that I haven't been able to listen to any of them yet?)
"Just so you know, whatever happens after the mission even if you are married to someone else remember that I will always be your friend, your best friend. And Elder Haslam, Elder Plank, Elder Tagge, and I all say Hi. I love you, Sierra!"
"You are amazing! Don't forget to study the scriptures cada dia." I love how he still looks after me. lol I also love how our letters are 100% Spanglish.
Also, I wrote a letter to his companion a while ago and I got his response.
I asked what kind of missionary Seth was and he answered, "He is one of the best. He is progressing very fast and he really knows how to teach the people. I am learning a lot from him and I've got more than 4 times as much time as he does on the mission. He is going to be a great missionary."
Then asked what stands out about Seth to him and he said, "I'd have to say the spirit he has with him. He always brings the spirit when he teaches and he always is following the promptings."
I told him that Seth always used to love pulling pranks on me and teasing me and asked if he did any of that to his companion. His response? "Thankfully he hasn't yet but I think he might be planning one out as I write so thanks for the heads up. I'll be watching my back and sleeping with one eye open now." Haha...Oh, Seth...
And last but not least I asked if I was being a distraction. I really don't know what I would have done if he would have said yes, but I needed to be sure because I don't want to hinder the work and keep him from progressing. I also told him to watch out for Seth because sometimes he does some stupid things. lol He's a smart boy, but he's a boy nonetheless and we all know their brilliant ideas aren't always super safe. His companion told me, "No, you are not a distraction. We missionaries need a lot of support and love because it keeps us going when times get tough. He is focused so don't worry. I'm making him work so hard he doesn't have time to get distracted. Don't worry I'm watching out for your Elder Ramsay and I'll make sure he comes back with honor."
Oh gosh. I miss that boy. Lately I've been slacking a little bit and it's hard for me to remember what it was like when he was here. I know I was happy and content when I was with him and I know I haven't had that exact feeling since he left, but I've forced myself not to think about it for so long it's almost difficult to bring it back to the front of my mind. Sometimes it feels as if this missionary girlfriend thing is just a dream. It truly feels like I have an imaginary boyfriend. When I look at pictures of him, though, I remember. When I read his letters, it comes back. And when I truly think about my life without him, I can't. I know this will all be worth it, I just have to do this six month thing three more times and I have a feeling these next three times are going to be much easier than the first. Halfway mark, here I come.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Pure Awesomeness
Today I read something written by another MG that was AMAZING!!! I loved everything she said and so I'm going to share my favorite part with you (and highlight my very favorite of favorites). Because it's just that awesome.
"If you don't want to distract then add. Add to his testimony and mission! Put more focus on what he's doing... on things around him. I give him my opinion all the time on things he writes me. It feels right. I'm glad I write him once or twice a week, and only in emails really... because he is not my job right now and I am not his. We have two years roughly to prepare to enter perhaps the most sacred and binding covenants here and in heaven. It's a serious and frightening thing... Not only this, but you and your elder, have giant targets painted on your backs... because you want a family, a righteous family. Things are getting hard, and they'll get worse to get better. We're primary targets for the greatest evil on earth and we have two years to make ourselves strong enough to involve someone else into it... his feelings and emotions, his perfections and failures. If we don't become both women of strength and women of nurture, (to some one may come easier then the other...) we will be at risk. So I ask, what are you doing every day to build yourself up? How are you stronger today then yesterday? and most importantly of all, how are you building others? and how do you make sure you don't detract from his mission or his work? Because he is probably Satan's primary target right now and he'll hit him any way he can... He needs every bit of strength the lord can give him and it is our duty to give him that. We are daughters of a Heavenly King, we are made to fight this war in the name of all we care for. We do not just get the happily ever after, we get the bloody satisfaction of earning it, of working and fighting for it. We are not sit and wait princesses, we are go and do princesses. We have God given abilities to help win this battle over our own lives. But you need to actively do something. There is no possible way a celestial marriage may form from those who sit and stew. We need to actively ask the lord what is best and what we need to do... for ourselves and others. If it's hard? "Forget yourself and get to work..." or just work through it. It may not be an answer you like. But it will be the right one. 'sometimes the lord calms the storm. Sometimes the lord calms the sailor. And sometimes he just lets you swim.' We must actively search for the best thing to do for ourselves and our elders... not the most convenient."
Well put, my friend. Well put.
"If you don't want to distract then add. Add to his testimony and mission! Put more focus on what he's doing... on things around him. I give him my opinion all the time on things he writes me. It feels right. I'm glad I write him once or twice a week, and only in emails really... because he is not my job right now and I am not his. We have two years roughly to prepare to enter perhaps the most sacred and binding covenants here and in heaven. It's a serious and frightening thing... Not only this, but you and your elder, have giant targets painted on your backs... because you want a family, a righteous family. Things are getting hard, and they'll get worse to get better. We're primary targets for the greatest evil on earth and we have two years to make ourselves strong enough to involve someone else into it... his feelings and emotions, his perfections and failures. If we don't become both women of strength and women of nurture, (to some one may come easier then the other...) we will be at risk. So I ask, what are you doing every day to build yourself up? How are you stronger today then yesterday? and most importantly of all, how are you building others? and how do you make sure you don't detract from his mission or his work? Because he is probably Satan's primary target right now and he'll hit him any way he can... He needs every bit of strength the lord can give him and it is our duty to give him that. We are daughters of a Heavenly King, we are made to fight this war in the name of all we care for. We do not just get the happily ever after, we get the bloody satisfaction of earning it, of working and fighting for it. We are not sit and wait princesses, we are go and do princesses. We have God given abilities to help win this battle over our own lives. But you need to actively do something. There is no possible way a celestial marriage may form from those who sit and stew. We need to actively ask the lord what is best and what we need to do... for ourselves and others. If it's hard? "Forget yourself and get to work..." or just work through it. It may not be an answer you like. But it will be the right one. 'sometimes the lord calms the storm. Sometimes the lord calms the sailor. And sometimes he just lets you swim.' We must actively search for the best thing to do for ourselves and our elders... not the most convenient."
Well put, my friend. Well put.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
What is Waiting?
Okay, friends. Here's the deal, I'm going to vent in this blog post. If you don't like it, don't read it.
Missionary girlfriends. Missionary girlfriends are these awesome, patient people and I love getting to know each one of them that I come in contact with. Over cyber-space of course, I definitely don't run into them in person but somehow we all seem to find each other. They are all very supportive. But you see, there is a problem. Much of this elite group is often very close-minded. Not all of them, please don't assume I'm talking about you, dear reader, because, well, I'm probably not. There are some super super amazing girls who I have grown to love and, well actually that's all of them, but sometimes I just don't agree with everything.. Allow me to explain myself.
There are some girls who go on dates and realize that they are starting to get feelings for other guys after their missionary has been gone awhile. Another girl told of how her missionary told her in an email that he had heard a talk or something and felt like she needed to be dating other guys while he was away but he still wanted her to write him and be there when he got home. She was pretty upset about all of this and instead of trying to calm her down and have her see that he wasn't trying to hurt her feelings, he just wanted her to be happy and was letting her know that he trusted her, other girls responded with comments telling her that they would be super upset too and that she shouldn't go on any dates and she just shouldn't tell her missionary that part. Someone else had been talking to her mom and she (the mom) had told her (the MG) that she really needed to date while he was away, not only because she wanted her to be happy but she wanted her to know for sure that she was making the right decision by waiting. And let's face it, girls, it's a big, important decision. That's two years of our lives. The response to that one was that all the other girls had had the same conversation with their mothers when their missionaries had left. (Haven't we all?) A few of them told her to go ahead and start dating, it may even strengthen her love for her missionary and appreciating him more, but most of them advised this girl not to listen to her mother because they hadn't. They said that moms couldn't understand because they weren't going through it so they didn't really know what was best.
Okay. Now. What problem do I have with this? Well, I have a lot of problems with this. And there's a good chance you're going to have a problem with me, and that's okay but I think you've read thus far, you should hear me out. 1) Moms are smart. If there's anything I've learned in the past 19, almost 20 years, it's that my parents know what they are talking about. I don't always agree and I don't always want to listen, but they are right 99.9% of the time. So maybe, instead of blowing off their advice, we should take it. 2) We are not statistics, but statistics do have something to say. Most girls don't wait the whole two years because it's hard. If it was easy, there would be more than 7% who were still here when their missionary got home and more than that meager 3% who actually got married. Kudos to that small percentage! That is so impressive and inspiring and I really hope to be apart of it in 18 months! But you know what? The other 93% aren't bad girls. They aren't horrible girlfriends. In fact, Seth's mother was a missionary girlfriend who ended up falling in love and getting married to someone else while her missionary was away and I am soo grateful that she did! If she hadn't I wouldn't have the wonderful boy that I have today. Plus I love both of Seth's parents and I would be very sad if we didn't have Chip around. Anyway, sometimes Heavenly Father just has other things in mind and we don't know what those things are. Who are we to tell our Heavenly Father, "Um thanks but no thanks. I'm going to go with my plan for myself"? Good luck with that one. Sometimes we just don't understand how something so great, like our missionary, isn't the answer. Because that's the answer we want. I'll admit it, I'm afraid to pray about waiting. I'm scared because I don't want to know if the answer isn't Seth. I want so desperately for it to be that way. Yet, I'm well aware that that may not be the case. I'm one of those people that need to know for sure, 100%, that I'm making the right decision. If I'm supposed to be here when Seth gets back, I will be. (And believe me, I'm planning on it.) However, if Heavenly Father has another plan for me, I need to know. And for that reason, I've started dating. Let's be honest, dating is fun. And it's taken me 6 months to get started, but I'm glad I have. Now don't go getting your pantyhose in a bundle, (that's a weird old saying my grandma used to use) I'm not Dear Johning Seth. That's a letter I don't ever want to write. I've just been on a few casual dates. And for the first time in 6 months, I don't despise the weekends. Yet, there are people who are angry at me for this. Why? Heck, I don't really know. Quite honestly I have no clue what it has to do with them at all, these aren't even other MGs, but no matter what you do someone somewhere isn't going to approve and hey, that's life. But before you judge me and say I'm a horrible person for beginning to date, I say this: You go 6 months alone. You say goodbye to your best friend. You go without eating for weeks because you're so upset you make yourself sick and you cry yourself to sleep every single night for 3 months and on and off for the next 3. You live for letters that sometimes don't come for weeks at a time. Then you can tell me that I have no right to date or even be around another male. Then you can tell me that I'm supposed to stay locked up in my room for 2 years.
3) Going back the the missionary girlfriends, I think it's amazing how, in Utah, they all hang out together and go on little MG road trips and such. That's great! I wish I were there to do it too, I wish we all were. The fact of the matter is, we're not. Unless you live in Utah, it's very unlikely that there is another girl waiting for her missionary nearby. Heck, in Nebraska I'm lucky if there's another one in the whole state. If there is, I sure don't know about it. So if we aren't supposed to date, and we're expected to only hang out with other girls like us, what the heck are those of us who don't live in Utah going to do every weekend? Faithfully sit in our rooms and study and write letters and listen to sappy love songs for the full 2 years (and believe me, I did that for a fair share of these past 6 months)? I'm not bashing the idea of going on MG outings at all. I think It's awesome. I'm just saying, not all of us can do that.
Okay. I've got it out of my system. I'm sure I'm going to want to delete this as soon as I post it because I really don't want to offend anyone, but I won't erase it. I won't even edit it. Because I think it's important that we realize that waiting doesn't mean we can't be near anyone of the opposite sex. It means we will still be here when our missionaries come home and here, my friends, is where I intend to be.
Missionary girlfriends. Missionary girlfriends are these awesome, patient people and I love getting to know each one of them that I come in contact with. Over cyber-space of course, I definitely don't run into them in person but somehow we all seem to find each other. They are all very supportive. But you see, there is a problem. Much of this elite group is often very close-minded. Not all of them, please don't assume I'm talking about you, dear reader, because, well, I'm probably not. There are some super super amazing girls who I have grown to love and, well actually that's all of them, but sometimes I just don't agree with everything.. Allow me to explain myself.
There are some girls who go on dates and realize that they are starting to get feelings for other guys after their missionary has been gone awhile. Another girl told of how her missionary told her in an email that he had heard a talk or something and felt like she needed to be dating other guys while he was away but he still wanted her to write him and be there when he got home. She was pretty upset about all of this and instead of trying to calm her down and have her see that he wasn't trying to hurt her feelings, he just wanted her to be happy and was letting her know that he trusted her, other girls responded with comments telling her that they would be super upset too and that she shouldn't go on any dates and she just shouldn't tell her missionary that part. Someone else had been talking to her mom and she (the mom) had told her (the MG) that she really needed to date while he was away, not only because she wanted her to be happy but she wanted her to know for sure that she was making the right decision by waiting. And let's face it, girls, it's a big, important decision. That's two years of our lives. The response to that one was that all the other girls had had the same conversation with their mothers when their missionaries had left. (Haven't we all?) A few of them told her to go ahead and start dating, it may even strengthen her love for her missionary and appreciating him more, but most of them advised this girl not to listen to her mother because they hadn't. They said that moms couldn't understand because they weren't going through it so they didn't really know what was best.
Okay. Now. What problem do I have with this? Well, I have a lot of problems with this. And there's a good chance you're going to have a problem with me, and that's okay but I think you've read thus far, you should hear me out. 1) Moms are smart. If there's anything I've learned in the past 19, almost 20 years, it's that my parents know what they are talking about. I don't always agree and I don't always want to listen, but they are right 99.9% of the time. So maybe, instead of blowing off their advice, we should take it. 2) We are not statistics, but statistics do have something to say. Most girls don't wait the whole two years because it's hard. If it was easy, there would be more than 7% who were still here when their missionary got home and more than that meager 3% who actually got married. Kudos to that small percentage! That is so impressive and inspiring and I really hope to be apart of it in 18 months! But you know what? The other 93% aren't bad girls. They aren't horrible girlfriends. In fact, Seth's mother was a missionary girlfriend who ended up falling in love and getting married to someone else while her missionary was away and I am soo grateful that she did! If she hadn't I wouldn't have the wonderful boy that I have today. Plus I love both of Seth's parents and I would be very sad if we didn't have Chip around. Anyway, sometimes Heavenly Father just has other things in mind and we don't know what those things are. Who are we to tell our Heavenly Father, "Um thanks but no thanks. I'm going to go with my plan for myself"? Good luck with that one. Sometimes we just don't understand how something so great, like our missionary, isn't the answer. Because that's the answer we want. I'll admit it, I'm afraid to pray about waiting. I'm scared because I don't want to know if the answer isn't Seth. I want so desperately for it to be that way. Yet, I'm well aware that that may not be the case. I'm one of those people that need to know for sure, 100%, that I'm making the right decision. If I'm supposed to be here when Seth gets back, I will be. (And believe me, I'm planning on it.) However, if Heavenly Father has another plan for me, I need to know. And for that reason, I've started dating. Let's be honest, dating is fun. And it's taken me 6 months to get started, but I'm glad I have. Now don't go getting your pantyhose in a bundle, (that's a weird old saying my grandma used to use) I'm not Dear Johning Seth. That's a letter I don't ever want to write. I've just been on a few casual dates. And for the first time in 6 months, I don't despise the weekends. Yet, there are people who are angry at me for this. Why? Heck, I don't really know. Quite honestly I have no clue what it has to do with them at all, these aren't even other MGs, but no matter what you do someone somewhere isn't going to approve and hey, that's life. But before you judge me and say I'm a horrible person for beginning to date, I say this: You go 6 months alone. You say goodbye to your best friend. You go without eating for weeks because you're so upset you make yourself sick and you cry yourself to sleep every single night for 3 months and on and off for the next 3. You live for letters that sometimes don't come for weeks at a time. Then you can tell me that I have no right to date or even be around another male. Then you can tell me that I'm supposed to stay locked up in my room for 2 years.
3) Going back the the missionary girlfriends, I think it's amazing how, in Utah, they all hang out together and go on little MG road trips and such. That's great! I wish I were there to do it too, I wish we all were. The fact of the matter is, we're not. Unless you live in Utah, it's very unlikely that there is another girl waiting for her missionary nearby. Heck, in Nebraska I'm lucky if there's another one in the whole state. If there is, I sure don't know about it. So if we aren't supposed to date, and we're expected to only hang out with other girls like us, what the heck are those of us who don't live in Utah going to do every weekend? Faithfully sit in our rooms and study and write letters and listen to sappy love songs for the full 2 years (and believe me, I did that for a fair share of these past 6 months)? I'm not bashing the idea of going on MG outings at all. I think It's awesome. I'm just saying, not all of us can do that.
Okay. I've got it out of my system. I'm sure I'm going to want to delete this as soon as I post it because I really don't want to offend anyone, but I won't erase it. I won't even edit it. Because I think it's important that we realize that waiting doesn't mean we can't be near anyone of the opposite sex. It means we will still be here when our missionaries come home and here, my friends, is where I intend to be.
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